Marriage Improvement

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Been married long? Or at least does it seem like you’ve been married a really, really, long time? Getting bored? Getting frustrated or tired of your marriage routine? It’s probably because you feel stuck in a rut. Maybe you’ve run out of things to say to your spouse, run out of things to talk about? Here are 5 things you can do to improve your marriage:

  1. Date your spouse: Yes, you still date in a marriage! At least twice a month, go do something fun together, just the two of you, without the kids. Take turns planning the evening. It doesn’t have to always be dinner and a movie and it doesn’t have to always cost money. Hold hands, put your arm around each other, hug and kiss; it’s the little things that make all the difference.
  2. Be your spouse’s best friend: Be interested in their day, what goes on in their life when you are not with them. Spend time with your spouse just because you want to be with them, do chores together, watch T.V. together, exercise together. The mundane can be fun when done together with your best friend.
  3. Communicate more: Weekly meetings to discuss plans, things coming up in the week is a must. Talk about the little things, talk about the big things, apologize more, laugh more, thank your spouse for making dinner or mowing the lawn. Kindly make your requests known and listen to your spouse’s requests and concerns. And when you do fight (because you will), commit to no yelling, no insults or name calling and forgive and move on quickly.
  4. Schedule sex: What’s less romantic than scheduled sex? How about no sex at all. With work, kids, church and after school activities, etc., sex can often get pushed to the back burner, but sex is necessary for a good marriage. Twice a week is average. And when you know it’s happening that day, it can become something to look forward to.
  5. Make your spouse your priority: Statements like; What can I do to make your day better? How can I help you today? What would you like for dinner? Can I get your car washed for you? Greet them at the door with a smile and a kiss when they arrive home from work. Compliment them, encourage them.
These are all very simple and small things, but they can make a big difference in your marriage.

Marci Harper, M.A., LPC

Posted by Marci Harper, M.A., LPC

Marci joined the Cassie Reid Counseling team fall 2013. As a licensed professional counselor, she is dedicated to counseling children, married couples, families and individuals as they journey towards emotional and spiritual healing.

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